the way the idea of “boundaries” has been sooo twisted and weaponized to be another avenue of control in relationships is so insidious and disgusting.
and like. preferences/boundaries do not exist in a vacuum. they are not tools for you to evade accountability. you cannot be absolved of bigotry or abuse or mistreatment by labeling it as a preference or boundary. boundaries and preferences rooted in misogyny, transphobia, racism, etc are still misogynistic and transphobic and racist and you can be held accountable for it. “you can’t force me to -“ Sure, but you can still face consequences for it.
